Something that truly concerns me...
My roommate was raised on a farm. She said once that if you were to look at just the face of a sheep and the face of a goat they are really quite similar. This got me thinking about the time I stayed on a friends farm. I went out into the fields to walk them alone and found myself wondering the difference between which were wheat and which were tares. It was hard to tell.
I have times where I sense an urgency within myself about something and I'm not quite sure what it is, but I know that it's a spiritual urgency. I have for the first time this year begun to ask myself a scary question. "How do I know if I am a sheep or a goat?" "How do I know that I am a wheat and not a tare?" How do we know these things if they are so similar? How do I really know if I really love God for the right reasons?
My brain feels so cramped by these thoughts, that I don't think I can write more on this subject...at least not yet, but one thing is for sure, I must pursue the answer.
She's Having a Baby
10 years ago
2 comments:
Hi Colleen, thanks for stopping by my blog and for leaving a comment. I'm always delighted to meet new blog friends.
I've been reading through some of your previous posts. You asked, "How do I know?"
I do not have the answer for you. But I will continue to point you in the direction it seems you are pursuing... Jesus.
When I asked Jesus Christ to forgive me of my sin and come into my heart and be my personal Savior, He came in to stay. And no matter how far at times I may have wandered, He never let me go.
When my first husband died, (I was twenty-five), I asked myself some hard questions, things that scared me. The thought came into my head, "Well, Susan, is your faith real?" Even though my heart ached, I knew Who I needed to go to... Jesus, my Savior. I knew I'd never make it without Him. And He has helped me in so many ways over the last fifteen years. I would never wish the trials I have been through on anyone, but God has helped me grow in Him by leaps and bounds. Hard times have a way of revealing what we really believe deep down in our hearts.
Keep looking to Jesus. When you become His child, saved by grace through faith (like Ephesians 2:8,9 says), God holds you in His Almighty hand and never lets go! (see John 10:28)
Hope we can visit more. Keep seeking God's Kingdom...
Susan
Susan- I appreciate your encouraging words. I have realized that in my early years with the Lord, I relied on him...then slowly, within the past few years I found myself relying too much on Church. This has subsequently thrown me off in how I perceive the Lord and what I believe. I feel as though the Lord has opened my eyes to this and that I must stopping seeking him based on what other people say or even what a man in the pulpit says, but that I must know Him for Myself.( Mind you, I am still in church =)) This has begun to make me more hungry for Him and hungry for Truth.
BTW- I love your website. It is very encouraging to me.
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