Monday, October 15, 2007

The Dream

I had this dream once. I dreamt that a man came to take me out to dinner. He was taller than me and I had to look up to see his face, but I was shy because whenever I looked at him he was intensely looking at me, every time. So I never got a good look. I just remember that he was tall with dark hair, a beard and wavy hair that was nicely combed back.

He came to pick me up in a limousine and I remember feeling silly about how unnecessary it seemed to come and get me in something so fancy. Something you would only use for a special occasion. Nevertheless, we ended up at beautiful and elegant restaurant with a soft ambiance and I was looking at the prices of everything and remarked how expensive everything was and all the wine was expensive too.

I remember thinking how I couldn't afford anything there. But He said to me very matter of fact. “I’m ordering the best wine, so you might as well get whatever you want.” It was like his way of saying that money was no object of concern. All through dinner I was trying to divert my eyes from his because he kept staring at me. I kept looking at my plate and around the room. I kept having that feeling of “What are you looking at?” but I didn’t say anything.

After dinner, we got back in the limousine so he could take me home. I remember sitting next to the door and he was sitting in the middle next to me. He had his right arm around my shoulder. Then I remember thinking that I was being an idiot and this man was obviously crazy about me and I didn’t think I was worth it to him, but he did.
I remember thinking to myself that I didn’t want to let this man love me because I didn’t feel worth it, but he loved me anyway. So I decided that if he was going to love me regardless, then I wanted to allow myself to love him back.

It was hard for me to reach out to him emotionally but I did it anyway. I tentatively took my right arm and wrapped it around his side which caused me to lean into him. I realized he had been waiting for me to do this because upon doing so he immediately wrapped his left arm around me and embraced me in a hug. With my head under his chin I was compelled to look up at him one more time. I knew he wanted me too. As I tilted my head up he was already looking down at me with eyes filled with such love that I have never felt or seen before.

It was then that I awoke and upon sitting up in bed I realized…that it was Jesus.

3 comments:

1988 said...

I like this journal better than the other one...but I like the other one too. I hope it's ok that I put a link to your blog (mynameisgirl) on my blog. Have a great week colleen.

-Nick

Colleen said...

"I like this journal better that the other one." That's interesting, you're the first person to say that. Sometime you'll have to tell me why. Yeah, 'sokay about the link. I linked you to mine, too.

Ciao Nick!

1988 said...

Hey Colleen.

My email address is nicklapratt@gmail.com. I don't think that communication by blog is set up in a very convenient way, so I wanted to give it to you in case you wanted to get back with me. I'd be glad to tell you why I like the "love letters" blog better than the other..AND I wish you and Anna could have made it to the party last week! It was a blast and I will most definitely blame Steinar for the fault of your absence. I hope that you have a great day Colleen.

Keep well,

Nick